Sunday, January 27, 2013

New Beginnings is over...YAY!! It was lovely and the only thing that really was a problem was that when you leave girls to decorate things by themselves it sometimes looks a mess. But, then you send older girls in to help and it turns out just fine. I also had a glitch with my part of it, but that's just the way things go with technology. I had pulled up the video I wanted to use and had it down in the task bar waiting, exactly where I wanted to start. Then Trish handed me the cd to use for prelude music. That's great, I put it in and didn't think about it at all. When I went to start the video, I pushed resume expecting it to start my video where I had paused it, but nope...it started playing the cd again...ARRRGGGGHHHH!!! So then I had to find the video again, forward it to where I wanted it to play and then it was ok again. Sheesh! But, it was ok, because we had a scroll to hand out to the girls and we were trying to decide when the best time to do that would be and so Shelly did it while I was futzing with the computer, so it worked out fine. I just hate it when stuff like that happens...I try to be so prepared and have everything lined up, but sometimes it just doesn't work out. Since I already had windows media player open for the video when I put the cd in, it just used the media player to play rather than itunes opening like I figured it would. Hopefully I'll remember that next time and open itunes first. Live and learn I guess...my problem will be recalling what I've learned when I need it again. But, I think it was a successful night and the girls did a really good job with their parts. I thought it before at camp and I was reminded again of what a good girl Peyton Garner is. She was the only one out of all the girls and the leaders that stayed until the end of all the clean up with Trish and I. Katy had to go get her kids so I understand that one, but the others helped for a bit and then left. I'll never get that, I guess it's just not in my nature, but as a leader I would think you would feel a little responsible to help until it's done. Oh well. Good News!! Dad had his "end of radiation" test done and it's good news!! The two tumors they were targeting have shrunk AND the other tumors have not grown! In the past couple of months there has been no growth which is far beyond what they were expecting. They only gave him 4 to 6 months to live and so they were expecting massive growth and spreading and none of that has happened. He also has had no symptoms yet...no coughing, no shortness of breath, nothing which is more good news. He's drinking two different types of tea, eat blueberries, staying away from sugar, and taking frankincense as holistic approaches since there's not a lot modern medicine can do for him and something seems to be working. We'll take every day we can get! Spencer seems to be completely better now. He hasn't said anything about headaches or other symptoms from his concussion, so I'm assuming that has healed. He is working hard and getting along with his companion and members in both of his wards, so that is good news as well. I seem to have hit my limit of attention I can give to this today :)

Sunday, January 20. 2013

Another week down, another week of school, work, laundry, cleaning, eating, making messes, not wanting to clean them up, wasting time, being productive, etc etc. I will be glad to have New Beginnings over this Wednesday. There has been a lot to do to get ready for it and I know it's not really true but I have felt a disproportionate amount of work has been given to me. I think it's because of the stress between Trish and Katie, but I will be really glad that it is over. I know things are always like this before something big so I'm trying to not get too worked up about it all. There is still lots to do and we're getting close on time. Today and tomorrow (holiday, no school, no Wendy's...YAY!!) I will spend getting all the last minute things done...my ending talk, projector borrowed, stepping stones done with girls, cake picks made. Plus I am determined to get Christmas put away as well. I always do this...make big long lists of things to do on my days off, but this is stuff that has got to be done or there will be trouble! Oh, I also want to get as much done as possible on Alysa's baby set. Reo-Marie was born this past week so I need to hurry and get her present done. Nope, not too much to do in not enough time. Of course it would help if I wouldn't spend so much time on the computer doing silly things and wasting all that time. I've also been struggling with my skin this past week or so. My face is so dry I am flaking and I look like I'm 70 years old. I'm writing this down now and tagging it so next winter when it happens again I can look back and see that it was about this time. It seems like it happens every winter about now, but I haven't really written it down to keep track. I'm also trying to decide if it has anything to do with what I am using to wash my face with. Right now I am using Oil of Olay plus some coconut oil with frankincense and lavender in it. I started with the Oil of Olay only and that wasn't working...dried my skin out a little. Then I started using the oil with frank in it because frankincense is supposed to be good for the skin and age spots. That seemed to make it worse...or is it just because of the freezing cold temperatures..not sure. So then I put the lavender with it and it still is horrible, so I stopped using the coconut oil thinking that might be making it worse. Instead I just added the frank and lavender straight to the lotion. It still is bad...it's hard to say to what degree if any not using the coconut oil has helped or maybe it's because it hasn't been in the single digits temperature-wise any more. Who knows...but my conclusion is this...next month I am going to buy some Mary Kay. I have got to do something about this because not only do I feel like I want to scratch my face off, I look terrible. I'm drinking lots of water to make sure dehydration isn't part of the problem as well. I seem to remember doing this with Mary Kay as well, but we'll just have to see next year. There has got to be something that I can do to stop this from happening every winter.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

How do people who communicate so differently figure out a way to work together successfully? Especially when it seems that both feel like they are bending over backwards to include and communicate with the other and yet they both feel like they are getting nothing from the other person? I told myself I wasn't going to stew over this, that they would have to work it out themselves, but here I am thinking about it. And I'm not complaining, but maybe talking it out to myself will lend some insight or I will be inspired in some way with a way to help. I am in the middle of two very wonderful people who just can't seem to figure out how to talk to each other. One likes and needs to talk things out, discuss, go over and over things, then decide what to do and do it. Another wants things cut and dried, very little discussion, no planning, just do it, last minute, stay out of my way. The sad thing is that I can see both of their points. One is very short and yet when she has been given the opportunity to be in charge of something she does exactly what she complains about the other for...non communication. They both have their own way of going about things and it ends up that neither one knows what is going on. It's painful. It makes me want to have a calling where I am by my own little lonesome with no one else to have to get along with. Which is really funny because I was just saying to myself earlier today that I hope they weren't going to release me soon because it would be hard to go to a calling that I didn't work closely with anyone. I love these women, they want to do the best they can for the girls but the way they go about it is so very different from each other. One is very permissive and doesn't see a problem where the rest of us do and that causes more problems. I'd like to know how best I can help them talk to each other and really hear what the other person is saying. Today in the Bishop's office with him listening they were trying to talk to each other and tell the other the frustrations they were having and it was very apparent to me that nothing got through to the other. I'll just say that I've never been in a position where the bishop has had to call in a presidency to try to work out personality issues. It reminds me of that horrible year at school when we had to have regular meetings with our supervisor in attendance because there were so many problems. That was much much worse because there was one person making problems for all the rest and that is not the case here. Both women love the girls and want to do the best they can for them but the way they go about doing it is the problem. Anyway, I'm going around in circles and it's not helping, so I'm going to end this. Maybe a detailed agenda for our meetings would help so they don't go so long would help with a specific emphasis on the calendar and meetings for stake things would help one while a suggestion to ask specific questions and restatement for clarification would help the other. I don't know, but I know it will be a matter of prayer...well, it has been, so I guess it will continue to be a matter of mighty prayer for all of us. I just hope we can figure this out before they release us.

Saturday, January 12, 2013

It's funny how I start thinking I want to talk about one thing and then don't make it to that subject. Last post I was going to talk about the week of the wedding and Doug coming home, but I never made it to that week. I did cover lots of things leading up to it, but not that week. Last summer was crazy though, so many things going on all summer. There wasn't a week that there wasn't something to do to get ready for the wedding or Doug. Thank goodness I had wonderful help from friends and family. I couldn't have done it without them for sure. Between Kate, Melissa, Karen, Kristin, and Kim, I kept my head on and got everything done. The biggest issue was that Sam was in Provo...good and bad to that....good that he and Natalya had not so much time to be together and have problems, but bad that there were many things that had to wait until he came up for a visit. And then his visits home were full of things he didn't want to do. Anyway, we spent Monday and Tuesday getting Doug's room clean and all his clothes pulled out, washed, and put away. The lawn mowed and yard cleaned up for Sunday, food cooked, and last minute things done. I'm sure there were more things to do, I think I've blocked most of it though out of self preservation. Wednesday we had a long list of things to do before we went to the airport and I think we got most of them done because I was geared up and ready to get my baby home. We picked up Natalya on the way down and then met Sam at the airport. Once we were there we went to the baggage claim area and found Sam. We located Doug's flight info and waited for his plane to get in. There was a huge group of people with balloons and signs waiting for their elders to get home which is always fun to see, but at the same time it was annoying. They were making it difficult for the people coming off the planes to get through and get to the baggage claim areas. So we hung back out of the way and I kept my eyes on the board waiting for it to say Doug's flight had landed. Once it did, I kept waiting for this big group of missionaries to come down the escalator, but they didn't come and didn't come. Plus, there were several planes that had landed close together so I didn't know when he would come and I kept expecting to have all the people in front of us see their missionaries first since they had been there long before we got there. All of the sudden there was Doug and one other elder half way down the escalator and I was clear on the other side of the room! I couldn't catch his eye, so I started moving over to get closer since there were so many people in the way. His companions family were there at the bottom waiting for them but it took me a minute to get over there. I didn't wait for the rest of the family either, I almost ran over there to get there as fast as I could. Finally he saw us and the relief was visible on his face. I'm sure it was only a minute or two, but it seemed much longer to me. After hugs for everyone except Natalya who got an awkward hand shake we got his luggage and headed back home. We had enough time to get to the house, bring luggage in, then head back to the stake center to meet with the Stake President. The traffic was horrible on the way home, but we were smart and took Legacy so we didn't have too much to deal with. Sam and Natalya were on the freeway and it was at a standstill for most of the way to Lagoon. Anyway, Jack decided to stay home and cook dinner (pizza of course) while I went with Doug to get released. Pres. Watson spent some time talking with Doug alone then he asked me to come in as well. It was heart wrenching to see my boy with tears in his eyes realize his service was over. Something that he loved with all his heart had come to an end. He was broken hearted at the ending of it and sitting in his chair happy to be hone and yet wishing he was still in Florida. Such conflict and emotion! Pres. Watson mentioned at least twice that it was time to take the name tag off, but it got ignored and other things were talked about for a couple of minutes, then finally Pres. Watson standing next to Doug's side kindly and loving reached over, took his tag off and tucked it in his shirt pocket. We were all crying at this point. It was so difficult to watch and yet in that moment there was such love and care from Pres. Watson it was almost tangible. I cry every time I think about it. I was so glad I was there to witness that. We came home and ate pizza, I think we played games...actually I think the boys played Risk and I watched a movie and fell asleep on the couch. It was hard to want to go to bed and say goodnight to everyone...I think we just wanted to be together as much as possible. Sam stayed at the house the rest of the week so that gave he and Doug some time to talk and spend time together before the wedding. Thursday was busy...welcome home Doug...now let's get your brother married! I'm not sure exactly what needed to be done that morning, but I'm sure we spent most of that day busy, busy, busy. At 4 we started loading up cars with stuff to decorate the gum and by 6 we were in full swing decorating and setting up. It took quite a bit of time to figure out how to hang the pom poms, balloons, and lanterns the way we wanted them. So that was a pain, but we got them up and then moved on to the tables and chairs. Karen, Baxter, and kids came, Kim and kids were there, Mom and Dad came along with Chuck and Heather. Conley and Daniel wanted to see Doug so they came over and visited with him while we decorated around them. Kate and Melissa were also there helping out like the super fantastic friends that they are. It took a couple of hours to get it all put together which was what I expected it to take so I wasn't unhappy when we left the church between 8 and 9. We had to be up early to get to Logan for the sealing so it was off to bed as soon as we got done. I almost felt bad for Doug getting shoved right into wedding stuff as soon as he walked in the door, but it kept him from going stir crazy from lack of things to do for the first week I think. He was busy from sun up til sun down the first 4 days he was home, so the transition back into regular life was easier than Sam's was I think. I think I'll save the wedding day for another day...lots to say and remember and after a long day at work I'm ready for bed!

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

I think I'd like to record the week or so around the wedding and Doug getting home. That was such a crazy time! The whole summer was spent getting ready. June wasn't too bad since there wasn't a whole lot we could do that early, but the things that could be done we did. I spent hours looking through the DI to find glass serving bowls and jars for centerpieces. Kate Richardson came over twice or three times to help me make tissue paper pom poms and centerpieces. That was actually fun. When we were doing the pom poms I set up a table downstairs and we did them while we watched movies and talked. We did over 60 of them over two days. Then we made 3 different kind of jars. One was more like a vase, clear with glass beads in it and tissue paper flowers...oh ya, she helped me make those too...the flowers were made with rounds of tissue paper, two holes punched in the center. Then we put a pipe cleaner up through one hole and down through the other, twisted the extra around the "stem". Then we scrunched the tissue paper up around the pipe cleaner so you couldn't see the center part, making the "petals". The were quite cute. The second jar was covered in lace. We used mod podge and covered the jar in it, wrapped the lace around the outside and tucked it around the bottom of the jar. After it dried we tied a cream/gold ribbon around the neck of the jar. (it was cream colored lace) For the third jar we wrote things on the outside of the jar like...S+N in a heart ... love .... eternity ... family....forever...8-17-12 etc. in hot glue, then we spray painted the jars purple or lilac. Her colors were gold, purple, and cream, but I thought just one color of dark purple was too much, so I added lilac to the color scheme for the luncheon. The jars were all different sizes and shapes so we mixed and matched the jars to give it a nice variation, then put all 3 on a gold charger. I borrowed the young women's battery tea lights and put them in the two smaller jars that didn't have the flowers in them. It was a lot of work getting that all ready. But that was what June was, along with girls camp. July was spent getting the house and yard ready. I'm still not quite sure how we got through it all, but we did. Mom graciously offered the help of my family for a service project at my house that summer. I was grateful for the help and I really wanted the yard to look nice for Doug's welcome home. So, what could I have the family help with? Of course the east side parking strip has been an eye sore for many years and so that is what I chose. Trevor and I weeded and dug and weeded and weeded and weeded. We also spent many hours at Chuck's house digging rocks. I decided I wanted to do rocks around the bushes rather than bark, so we tried to get as many as we could from Chuck rather than buy them. Of course we were really happy with how many rocks we had until we started putting them out. But, I get ahead of myself. After weeding and clearing and filling up the burn pit with stuff, we laid down landscape fabric. Kim and Grandma came the Friday before and helped get that put down. Karen came a little earlier that day and helped get the rest of the weeds out. I think we went through about a thousand staples putting all that down. That parking strip doesn't look that big until you really look at it. It's 7 feet wide by 100 feet long (maybe 91 feet...but still!). Saturday Mom and Dad, Karen, Kim, and Chuck were there to help shift tons and tons of rock. It was hot and Dad made sure we took snack breaks so we didn't get sick. We still were done around noon! It was a lot of work done in a very little amount of time. It looks really good. I am so grateful for all the help we had. Mid July also brought another amazing blessing. Karen and Baxter offered to pay to have our bathroom redone. I explained to her that it would need to be taken down to the studs for a good portion of the room and there was sub floor damage as well, but she persisted, so we went ahead and did it. It took over 3 weeks to get it done. I wasn't sure we were going to make it by the wedding/homecoming, but we did! Karen had a contractor that they have used for a couple of things that did it for us. We had to get rid of all the drywall around the tub and then he had to replace only one panel of sub floor which I was surprised it was so little. But we got rid of the trim and the floor and everything. New tub, new toilet, new sink, new mirror. We did tile on the floor and half way up the wall behind the toilet. We got a new vanity with a tall cabinet in between the sink and the toilet. We did shower doors instead of a shower curtain and a new window. We also did cultured marble for the bath surround and the sink/counter top. We painted the walls and ceiling a beautiful blue for the ocean, the tile is a gray/blue/tan tile for sand, the tub surround and counter top is a tender gray marble, and the trim is white. I wanted a beach feel to it and I think I succeeded. I also got a new light fixture and they added a fan over the toilet plus a new heating vent. I'm scared to ask how much it ended up being, but the agreement was that it would be a loan, not a gift, so we will pay them back. Karen and Rebecca Smalley came and spent a couple of days helping me paint which was wonderful. Oh and I almost forgot the best part! Well, not the best part, because the whole is wonderful, but the contractor built me a towel bar/shelf that I absolutely love. It has a shelf then under the shelf if has 3 towel hooks instead of just a plain old towel rack. I truly love it! I also was so grateful to Nancy who bought me a hurricane vase and filled it with shells from Fiji. I also have a jar of sand that I put on top of the tall cupboard with the shells. Karen bought me some new towels, blue, tan, and green (ocean/beach colors) and two pictures that we put over the toilet of shells. I still want to get 3 or 4 shadow boxes and put a star fish, a big shell, and maybe some sand or something like that in them and hang them just about the shelf. So it looks like they are almost sitting on the shelf. Then I'd like another vase full of shells to put up on top of the cupboard with the others. I keep looking but can't find exactly what I want, so it waits. In the meantime I stole the shells the boys had in their room and put them on the shelf for now. I completely forgot that we did Trevor's room in June as well!! Sheesh...how could I forget that! That was so much work! After school got out for the summer, we emptied Trevor's room out and moved him into Spencer's room. We then stripped all the wall paper off of his walls. 3...THREE walls of wall paper! It was so not fun! Then, we painted. That was our first "girls Friday" with my sisters. We started fairly early in the day and didn't get done until after 2. Then Trevor and I spent another day touching up. Then I had this fantastic idea for his big wall. I measured out a rectangle the same size as his window in the middle of his wall. We painted the lovely blue/grey color he chose around that marked out part. The gray also went on the wall with his closet, but the inside of the closet we did white..it looks cool. Then I went and bought baseboard and framed the rectangle out. They sell magnetic paint now and so I painted the inside with magnetic paint. I was hoping for a magnetic wall that he could hang his posters and things up on, but I am sadly disappointed with the results. It's not very magnetic and it was so much money. But, it's black inside with white trim and then the gray on the wall..it looks good even it if doesn't hold things like I would like it to. I believe I will go buy sheet metal and hang it on the inside of the frame when I can deal with doing another big project. That will be more of what I was after. I also haven't put back his light switch cover and outlet covers because I want to switch it to white instead of the off white we have now. So, the summer was huge, full of major things to do and lots of them to get done before August came. There was very little sitting around wasting time this summer! It looks like I'll have to get to the wedding the next time. I am tired of sitting here and it is time to get dinner going and other things done!

Sunday, January 6, 2013

I have been working on my personal progress and one of my projects is to get organized and another one is to work on my family history. I have chosen to catch up on the boys mission letters and blog posts, that took about 15 hours of 20. So I have been thinking about what I could do to use up that other 5 hours and I just couldn't work on my scrapbook. My original goal was to do some scrapbooking, but I just haven't been able to make myself do it. I think catching up on my own journal counts as history, so this is what I am going to do for the rest of my time. It's hard to believe that I was so far behind that it took me 15 hours to catch up, but I had about a year of letters from Doug to print off and put in his book, then 9 months from Spencer, plus all his blog posts from about the last 3 months. His blog is what took up so much time! I had it all set up the way I wanted it and then for some strange reason it would go wonky on me and have some different font with a white background...it was weird. And the strangest part of it was that it wouldn't happen every time. Sometimes it would be just fine then others it would be messed up. I spent most of the 10 hours just working on his blog. I think I'm going to just have to write as the ideas come this time because if I try to catch up any other way I'll never remember everything and I'll think I'll be able to remember to say something when the time comes but I'll forget. I think I would be a much more insightful person if I took the time to write more. The inspiration I receive as I ponder things out loud and on "paper" really does outweigh just doing it without thinking about it, but I just can't seem to put the time into it. Maybe that's just Satan's way of making it so I miss out on those spiritual blessings and insights and keeping me from becoming a better person. I also get a complaining feeling when I write a lot. I don't like to be a complaining person and I feel like writing down my problems and struggles so I can think through them gives me a whiny feel. It should't be that way I suppose, but I really don't want to have my kids read my journals after I'm dead and have the impression that all I did was complain. So my challenge is to work through things, get my inspiration...revelation, and do it in a non-complaining way. Not a problem! First of all, I can't believe my Doug has been home for 4 and a half months! The two years he was gone felt so long on one hand and yet a blink of an eye on the other and the same can be said for the last few months he's been home. He is such a good kid and it is so much fun to have him around. I love having him home with us at night and he is always so positive about everything. He comes home from a full day at work (he's working with Jack at Wendy's doing maintenance) and says his day was great and he likes his job. Very rarely does he complain about anything. He helps out around the house without any complaining and takes care of his financial needs without any prompting or reminding from me. He listens to counsel from his parents, is kind to Trevor....he is just a joy to have around. We're trying to get him to go out on a few dates now and then, but he's not very interested right now. I'm sure the time will come, but I'd like him to have a bit of a social life so he at least will put himself in a position to meet the girl he wants to marry. He will get there and he'll marry a wonderful girl, it just has to be in his own time, not mine, and I have to remember that. He bought a wonderful little car, it's a Ford Focus with heated seats, heated side mirrors, a moon roof, bluetooth, and all other kinds of cool things. It's a fun little car that I wouldn't mind having myself. Plus it's front wheel drive which is nice since it's winter now. I don't worry about him like I do about Trevor driving the truck in the snow with it's rear wheel drive. Trevor is in the last half of his Senior year! My baby is almost out of school and it's time to celebrate! I guess we should get him graduated before we start throwing the party, but it's close enough I can taste it. I'm hoping his grades will be good enough to make it so he won't have to do any more online school than he's already doing. He had his US Government class online right now which he needs to finish up really quickly. He's doing a pretty good job juggling work and school, and dating. He is also a fun boy to have around. He is very little drama, even for a high school kid. He likes to be happy and is rarely unhappy. It's funny how easily you can tell he's upset or had a bad day but how hard it is to get him to open up about what is making him unhappy. We had a talk one night on the way home from work after he closed. I could tell from the second he got in the truck that it had been a bad night, but it took me almost half way home before he would tell me what happened. Such a good kid, but sometimes I wonder how much he keeps inside, or is he just that happy all the time. I hope he's just that way and doesn't keep things locked up. He has his license now and has been driving himself to work the last few weeks. It has been nice not staying up until midnight or later, but I also miss spending the time with him. We've had lots of good talks and fun singing and being silly together on the way to and from Syracuse over the last year. After the snow melts and icy roads aren't a problem we'll get him driving the mustang just in time for him to leave on his mission. Well, he'll have the spring and summer to drive it...and depending on when he goes, maybe some of the fall as well. Which brings me to his mission. The church lowered the age of missionaries to 18 for boys and 19 for girls this past October! What a huge thing! I think he had a mini panic attack when he heard, but it didn't take him very long to adjust his thinking and be ok again. The nice thing is that now they can go when they are ready, they don't HAVE to wait until they are 19, but can go when it works for them. We told Trev that as long as he was gone by the time he was 19...or at least had his papers in...then whenever he left was up to him. We'll get him graduated and go from there. I think he'll try to be gone by September..or at least his papers in by then. We'll just have to see what happens.